5 Lessons for My Daughter

Inspired by a question from Archana Challa, who was in turn inspired by this article: 5 Lessons I’m Going To Teach My Indian Daughter

 

1. Act Confident. The operative word here being ‘Act’. That’s what the rest of us are doing anyway, even though we don’t have a handle on life. Acting confident might make people think you really are, and that’s the whole point!

2. You are far superior. Men cannot create life. They cannot phathom the pain of childbirth, nor the physical and emotional challenges that follow. They do not undergo visibly embarrassing physical changes during adolescence. They do not know to navigate daily life, while secretly enduring an awful thing like menstruation. Their hormones do not play havoc on their bodies and minds throughout their lives. The worst cards men have ever been dealt are facial hair and itchy privates. No contest here.

3. Be a critical judge of everything. Be aware that a majority of what a man does or says from age 13 to the day he dies is simply yet another attempt to impress the ladies. Do not be easily impressed, or impressionable.

4. Get your hands dirty. Know how to ride a motorcycle and change a tire. Play puzzles and video games. Learn how to administer first aid and build a campfire. Travel by yourself. Work out to be in shape, not shapely. Break out in a full-throated howl when your favorite team wins. Don’t hesitate to curse if they lose. A bad-ass chick is way cooler than a hot girl.

5. You are average. You are not the greatest person in this world. Some are way smarter, sexier, stronger than you are. Do not fear or envy them. Learn a thing or two from them instead. You are not the worst person in this world either. Compared to you, some are lacking in talent, others in tact. Some are downright evil. If you cannot make yourself better than another person, that is okay. Just never become worse than another person.

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